A Night at Grandma's

Tonight a wave of a sweet, tender memory washed over me.

There were very few nights as a kid when I stayed overnight at grandma's house. I was usually scared to, to be honest. Even though it was a mere 15 minutes from home. But the memories of staying there are so thick in my spirit.

I want to reach out and grab them and never let go.

I remember bringing my VHS tapes of "I Love Lucy" that I had recorded off Nick at Nite. Grandma didn't have cable and I was very concerned about what I was going to watch. I knew Lucy would suffice.

The ache for this memory wells deep within me.

I would love to walk through the house again, as it was, during the good times and soak it all in. Now as it floats through my mind, I savor each picture and breathe in deeply.

I don't remember much else other than being scared at night. I needed grandma and she was there. Oh, how I miss her.

Her heart was so pure. So kind.

I remember walking to the grocery store and she carried a little black bag with her to put her groceries in. She was using reusable bags before they were cool. And she bought me the Glacier Mineral water. It was black cherry with a polar bear on it and a glass bottle. Because I was there, she bought it for me. It was a treat, it was special. It was grandma and me.

Grandma and I were kindred spirits. If we had the chance to sit down and talk now, I think we would never run out of things to talk about.

I would tell her how much those nights meant to me at her house. That she watched hours of Lucy with me. That buying that cranberry glacier water was a big deal. That I loved her little black bag she carried with her.

I don't quite remember where I slept those nights. If it was on the couch or in bed with her. Or where grandpa slept if that was the case. I'm guessing she probably held me for awhile and rocked me, even though I was well beyond the rocking age.

The memory of it is warm. It's a comfort. It is a blanket I want to draw around me and cozy up in. And squeeze it so tightly so that I don't miss a thing.

Grandma, if you only knew how much those days meant to me today. How I treasure them and keep them close to my heart. You loved me. I knew it well. Your love was a comfort to me. Just the sight of you brought me peace. You were the perfect grandma. I hope you know this. That I loved you deeply. And so much of who I am today is because of you. Thank you, Grandma. I love you.